August 25, 2009

I too cannot believe that we are at the last week. In this program, I have realized that I really don't know who I am, I mean what makes me, "me". Cinda and I went to Whispering Pines on Sunday and while we were walking/jogging, we had a great talk. I told her I felt like I was a jellyfish, just floating up and down and going through the motions of "life". In thinking about this, it is very sad. This program has helped me begin a new chapter in my life (still have old chapters to close but that will take time), it was truly time for a CHANGE. There are times that I just want to be that jellyfish so I don't get hurt and things are so out of my comfort zone but I believe that "baby steps" are going to be the best way. It so reminds me of the movie "What About Bob" with Bill Murray, cracks me up....at least I can hope that I am not THAT phobic but who knows, LOL. I try to make everyone happy so I don't stand up for myself or give my opinion or feelings on things so like Andy Nott said, how can anything get better if you don't take that chance? This will be a long process but again, baby steps. My son, Michael, told me the other day that my clothes were too big and I was fading away...he is the best, what an awesome boy I have. For positive notes, my favorite things so far have been the Zumba and actually Spin (who knew!). I think anything with music, I can just focus on that and go off to a different place than how much I am sweating and dying, LOL! I do enjoy the weights as well but they are not my favorites. I am sure I will say more later but thanks to Dynabody, the trainers, staff, the other four CHANGE peeps, Andy N., and the other members of the gym who have supported us and given us great words of encouragement all throughout this, it has been a great CHANGE!